The Truth

There are things that I wish would have never changed, but they were for the best.
There are doors that I wish would have never closed, but I'm glad they did.
There are times that I wish I could have what I once had, but I realize that that could never be.
There are places that I would like to see, but I can never get to see all.
There are times when I wish I would just disappear, but if I do I would miss out on the most important things that has happened.
I give thanks to the people who made me realize who I am, who made me change some of my ways, who had patience with me when I gave them a hard time, who knew how to wait for an answer, who gave me my own space, who were there when I needed them most.
Special thanks goes to Karen, who has helped me out a lot over the past. Without you, I would be walking in another direction.
I took this time to write these few words because one can never know what can happen and it's better to be prepared.

Some more of the past

Well, my father was one of those who ran away, hoping for something good to happen. I guess he was trying to make his way to another place to start over. Since his father sent him away, he just wandered about, from one place to the other, till he reached in Corozal. Once there, he was thinking of making his way across to Mexico, and then the U.S, but something happened.
I know my father and once he has his thoughts planted somewhere, he doesn't give up till he achieves what he wants. He got a job working in the cane fields, which was new to him since we don't plant cane down here. ( He was used to harvesting corn and beans, etc, which there will be some about, if I don't forget. ) Anyway, he was up there for a time and was working with different people. One of them was Ambrocio. Well, to make it shorter, life throws up many chances and bestows many gifts upon us. It so happened that this man had a daughter and she liked my father. They had to wait for some time before they were married, since she was barely 15.
Sorry for everything being so mixed up, but I was never good in writing, and never will be. At least I know I write, which I prefer to do over talking.
Since my father found a wife so far away from his home, we made up a story about it. They also don't tell us all the deatails, so we ask my grandmother. With what she tells us, me made up a beautiful story. I also got some ideas from the books I read.
When I have more time, I will be sure to post it. Very unique.
Hope everyone is alright and hope you find God as soon as possible. Time is too short for it to be wasted. With God in your life, everything will be great, but you have to believe.
In believing and trusting, things can happen. Pray without doubting and it will be answered.
Well, it seems that I left the past for now.
Right now I just want to talk about God. I always wonder how he made everything. The Bible says to leave all secret things unto God, but a curious mind can never do that. Only if I think about nothing, but that is impossible even for me at times. I used to, but life is not that simple and carefree anymore. More later

A Journey Into The Past

Many years ago, the people lived a very hard life. It is nothing compared to what we have now. Our life is made easy by countless electrical supplies and oppurtunities that we are offered. For the people back then, it was even hard for them to go to school. A lot of them didn't know how to read or write. The only language they knew how to speak was theirs. No English or Creole. Life was hard for both men and women, in its own way.
The men had to go to thier farms as early as 4 a.m. They usaully walked for about hour and a half to two hours. The women had to wake up every morning earlier than the men to prepare their breakfast and lunch. When they were through, they bagan with their daily duties. It would seem that waking up early and doing thier chores would mean that by the afternoon they would be finished with everything, but it wasn't so. They always did other things like sewing or embroidery or they made baskets and things out of clay.
Having kids was one of the things that I guess they couldn't control. Haha..... They had one almost every year. Traditionally, they waited two years after their marriage to have their first child and another two before the second and so on, but I guess they couldn't keep up to that. A kid's life was not what we are used to neither. Most of the time, the father forced them to go to farm with him, even the mother. The children barely went to school.
The girls usually got tired of what they go through and they wished that someone would come to ask their hand in marriage. Little did they know that having a husband was worse than living with their parents. If they didn't get beaten at home, then they surely got it at the hands of their husband, especially if they didn't do what they were supposed to.
My father always told us how it was when he grew up. He wasn't my grandfather's favorite and he suffered more. More than once he made him walk home from the farm with a big bundle of firewood on his back. And that was like a two hour walk without stopping to rest. By the time he grew up, he went away. It was like that for most of the boys. They always ran away from home because they grew tired of the way they were treated and were convinced that life out there was hard too but better.

to be continued

One Flaw in Women

I got to do this a little late, but I am still doing it. It's such a shame that a lot of women hide who they really are. But to those women who keep their head held high, I should say that I am very proud of them. Such a shame on the stupid men who make them feel that they aren't worth anything. Men take them as things that they can use and dispose of when they want. I just hope that one day, they will get to feel what it feels to be played with. Life is a cycle, and you can never run away from what should happen.
Enough of that. I must have bored you by now.

Women have strengths that amaze men
They bear hardships and they carry burdens,
but they hold happiness, love and joy.

They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy
and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take 'no' for an answer
when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have.
They go to a doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel
and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about
a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member,
yet they are strong when they
think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss
can heal a broken heart.

Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you
to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have the compassion and ideas.
They give moral support to their family and friends.
Women have vital things to say and everything to give.

HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,

IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.

Yesterday

This poem was originally written by John Lennon and Paul McCartney. I have decided to make some changes though.

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away,
Now it looks as though they're here to stay,
Oh I believe in Yesterday.

Suddenly, I'm not half the girl I used to be,
There's a shadow hanging over me,
Oh Yesterday came suddenly.

Why he had to go I don't know,
He wouldn't say.
I might have said or did something wrong,
But I know that is not the case.

Now I long for Yesterday.

Yesterday, love was such an easy game to play.
Now I need a place to hide away,
Oh I believe in Yesterday.

Now Yesterday is so far away
Never to be lived again.

coming soon
A Journey Into The Past