How Bad Is It?

These past days I have been thinking about the state of things in this country. I don't know about everything that happens throughout, but I don't need to know all to know that something is very wrong. Then I begin to wonder about what brings on these things. Are families so badly off that individuals have to commit robberies, murders, and all the horrifying acts? It is a fact that there are parents who know their kids are heading the wrong way, but what can they do? Are we totally helpless?
It is always said that we need to leave people be, to provide support, no matter who they are, but doesn't that go too far? Where do we begin to separate each other from supposed 'bad company' if our toleration helps to bring this about? All this doesn't only apply to our ongoing social community problems, but also to relationships, whether family, personal, romantic, business, and all the other -ships.
As I type this, I remember one of my dad's lessons. He drew a diagram on the board and to tell you the truth, the minute I saw it, I knew the truth and it changed certain points in my view.

Words can't make clearer what the eyes can see. The closer you are to God, the closer you are to each other. Even if one person is close and the other isn't, the partners are still far from each other.
So, does that mean that we all need to have a supreme being among us? Yes, it does. Even in the olden days, civilizations had a pantheon of gods in order to maintain a form of balance and harmony. Maybe that is why we are where we are?
Where is the STOP to all of this? It has just gotten worst. Robberies happen weekly in this tiny village, as if that would bring thieves lots of benefits. The worst thing is, we expect the thieves to be reckless youths and surprisingly, married men are involved.
How much more of this can we take? What will we do about what happens under our noses? Shall we sit and wait till various organizations think of more plans to eradicate crime?
I've always thought that solutions start in the home but there are always the black sheep. Those who do not listen to reason and abide by rules and you know what, them more I think about this, the more I contradict myself.
So this is it for now until I can think of something else to add later on.

New Acquisitions

Receiving and giving gifts has never formed a great part of my life. Well, certainly not as a kid. However, that has changed a bit over a few years.

The most recent of my gifts is:

Although I haven't used it much, I am greatly pleased with this new acquisition. Since I am not yet prepared for fancy clothing creations, this will suffice for now.

The following I have spent a lot of time with. I love it because it is just big enough, I can get lost in another world while using it, and the case is in one of my favorite colors, which is red.

Here is mine:

I love it because I can now read in the night after being told to turn off the light. My option then was to turn on the flashlight and sandwich it between my shoulder and my head. The only disadvantage is when the battery runs low when I am on the go and I have to quit reading. But then again, it's like finishing a book without having another to start.
Too bad I don't have a wireless connection here at home, so I don't get to browse with it.

What's With the $U.S?

A couple of months ago, I heard rumors that there were places that weren't accepting the $U.S. If they did, it was at a value of $1.98 BZ to $1 US. Just recently, the shopkeepers in the village have declared that they are not accepting the money. I didn't believe it but when I went to the shop today, I saw that it is true.

Is this happening all over the country or is it just down here in Toledo? They said one of the reasons they aren't accepting is because the bank isn't accepting when they do their deposit.

A Strange Occurrence

 Today, I got the opportunity to go to see what has frightened a lot of people.  I didn't get too close to inspect since there were a couple of guys there who didn't want me to drop in the hole.  jeje... I didn't want to show my disobedience so I just snapped a couple pix.  This is what it looks like at the top. 

By the time I got there this morning, they had already started working on the side, which was where the crack was seen more clear.  As you can see, it extends all the way away from me, did a little U-turn, and continued forward.


Honestly, I didn't smell anything weird or saw anything totally strange.  Somebody probably chopped the grass in the area that's why it looks so dry.  Oh, and I peeped inside and got no kind of skin reaction or weird feeling, or heard any sound.  I couldn't see how far down it cracked though.  Cracking of the soil is common in the dry season, but as big as this is unheard of. 

These two images were taken last week by my sister.

Departed

Early this morning I was awakened by the sound of sirens. It sounded so near yet so far away. At the same time, the dogs in the neighborhood all began to howl but it sounded so weird and sad. My phone said it was 4:17 A.M. I just waited until the noise calmed down then I fell asleep again.

The next time I checked the time it was around 8 but I was still feeling sleepy and I just didn't feel like getting out of bed. About an hour later, I literally forced myself to get up and take a bathe. That made me feel much better. One of my first thoughts was about the souls that wouldn't make it through this day. After I walked out of the house, not far from where I live, I noticed that there were a few men putting up a tent. I just passed by, then all of a sudden I thought that maybe the man didn't make it. I heard that he was not in good health ever since he was attacked by a bull on his farm.

This evening when I returned home, I noticed there were a lot of people dressed in black in front of the house and it was then that I knew for sure. As I passed by tonight, someone was playing an instrumental of 'What A Friend We Have In Jesus'. It's one of the hymns I love to sing so I recognized it and it made me feel sad because I was reminded of my grandmother.

Breaking News? Could be!!!!

There is something that the whole country will hear about sooner or later, depending on how fast the news gets to the Geology Department and environmentalist.
I haven't seen it for myself but I heard about it from my brother at the beginning of the week. Since he goes to high school, most of the time they come home with news from their friends about what is occurring in other villages and our own community. I do not have details as to what and when this happened but I will state all what I know so far.
In the village of San Antonio, Toledo, the Cisco workers who were working on the highway from Dump to Jalacte heard what sounded like a loud roaring beneath the soil they were working on. It is located right past the San Antonio Waterfall on the way to Santa Cruz. I suppose the sound is similar if not identical to the sound made by an earthquake. Since it was at the end of the work day, they left the area and imagine their surprise when they returned the following morning.
The hill was cracked at the side [not sure whether that is left or right] and debris covered the road.
It's too bad that I left from home this morning and I didn't get to see what I am talking about here. My sister told me they went there this evening and she described it is being 'freaky and weird'. I asked here to tell me about it and where it cracked open [if it was on the side, in the center, and if vehicles can pass] and these were her words: 'ye frm d whole side of d hill its craking n falling apart...it luks like crushed bisquit...d craks are getting wider evryday...ye vehicles pass bt its dangerous stl'. She also said that people go there daily to see what it's like. One girl even got inside/too near but she had to be taken to the hospital after she developed some form of rash or skin allergy.
I have no idea what this could be but I am guessing that maybe there is a dormant volcano somewhere and the trapped gas got released when the hill cracked open. They say it has a stench and that water sprouts out from time to time. Some say that the crack led all the way to Blue Creek [where there is also a cave]. One of my first thoughts when I heard about this strange phenomenon was that there could be a cave not far underneath the road. It has always been rumored that there is a cave behind the waterfall and now I suppose that is true. That place has always captivated me and I always wondered what lies beneath, for I am quite sure it cannot be solid rock!
There is something else about that waterfall but I will leave that for next time. Anyway, the theories have no limit. Here is one I had to kind of laugh at. 'The devil came out of the bottomless pit'!!!! Strange, but some of the people actually said so!
My sister says they will return on Saturday and she will try to get some pictures. If she does, I will be sure to post them. Maybe the Geology Dept. or some other people will be there soon since the people say the 'noshi wichil*' are coming. I hope my sister gets some pix before they close off the area if it's something big.
*means the people with authority

****************************
I was able to find out that the hill opened up last week Thursday. It's still not sure whether this was in the night or in the morning but a few people say it was around 7 a.m. My cousin said that they placed a dynamite in the area so they could test the type of rock. Even though that is the cause, how can the stench be explained? If it is a form of gas, what kind?

***************************
I was thinking and the trapped gas from an ancient dormant volcano may not be an explanation since there are no known volcanoes in Belize. I forgot to mention that some people say that they can still hear a roar. Is it the noise of flowing water? I know there is a cave somewhere in the area named Benil Okeb Ha'*¹. It is probably linked to the cave Benil Hok'eb Ha'*² in Blue Creek Village.
*¹ roughly translated: the way where water enters
*² way where water comes out

***************************
Another possible explanation that has occurred to me is an earthquake, but it's far-fetched. First of all, because noone felt a thing. Secondly, because dynamite was supposedly used in the area but I also came across a valuable piece of information. Dynamite is not used on that type of rock.

Truth Never Dies

Truth never dies. The ages come and go.
The mountains wear away, the stars retire.
Destruction lays earth's mighty cities low;
And empires, states and dynasties expire;
But caught and handed onward by the wise,
Truth never dies.

Though unreceived and scoffed at through the years,
Though made the butt of ridicule and jest,
Though held aloft for mockery and jeers,
Denied by those of transient power possessed,
Insulted by the insolence of lies,
Truth never dies.

It answers not. It does not take offense,
But with a mighty silence bides its time.
As some great cliff that braves the elements
And lifts through all the storms its head sublime,
It ever stands, uplifted by the wise,
And never dies.

As rests the Sphinx amid Egyptian sands;
As looms on high the snowy peak and crest;
As firm and patient as Gibraltar stands,
So truth, unwearied, waits the era blest
When men shall turn to it with great surprise.
Truth never dies.

Camisa

 This was what used up a lot of my free time.  I am glad I finally finished with it.  The last time I wrote, I had hoped it would fit the little girl but when she came to try it on, the sleeve was too tight.   I told them I would fix it when I get back, but I touched it till this morning and I have been here for a little over a week.  Laziness maybe, but I just didn't want to think about how to loose the sleeve and make it look good still.  I worked on the sleeves again from 8 to 12 noon!!!  As if I didn't have other things to do. . . Eventually, I got it done but it doesn't look as good as the one in this photo since I had to add on a strip of white where the black band joins. 

At 8,401 Days

Birthdays have never really been a 'BIG' day for me. This one was no exception except that I wasn't alone this time. Nobody says we have to celebrate the way other people do, and even if my parents wanted, I would never accept it. I prefer being somewhere else with the people that matter the most. Even though I could never be with all who matter, those who know me good know that I never forget even if it seems so.

Yesterday started off with me waking up about an hour earlier than usual. When everyone was ready, my dad drove us over to town. As usual, he never lets us know what he's thinking until it is time to 'get the plan in action'. So when it was time for lunch he said he would take us to a restaurant. The only thing is, there are not many places to choose from in town so we decided to go to Olympic Grill. It was good enough although there are many ways I can think of in which they should improve their service. Nevertheless, we ate and by the time we got back home it was after 3 p.m.

On our way home we picked up cousin Melva since we all planned to go to Lubaantun at 5. We chilled for a while then we started getting ready. My curiosity was what led me to declare that I would get to the Maya Temple, no matter what. If dad didn't say he would take us, I would have walked it. Anyway, we were the first ones to get there so we had enough time to get some pix. They are far from looking professional but the happiness that shows is what counts. So we were there taking a few shots when all of a sudden I silenced them to listen if they could hear what I heard. They heard what sounded like a cat in the distance, but only me heard what sounded like voices. The last thing all of us heard was the sound of someone running. We know that no one lives in the area nor does anyone stay there after 5. For what, we looked at each other, I stood up, and we all ran to the entrance where Dad and the watchman were talking. Once we saw them, we stopped to feel our hearts beating.

Not long after that, the people we were waiting for arrived. We headed back to where we ran from and took part in the lighting of the Sacred Fire for the torch run. Although I didn't understand a word the Kekchi Man prayed, I knelt down and faced each of the four corners they prayed to. He burnt candles of four or five different colors for each corner but that was after he addressed each of them.

When he finished praying, he asked everyone to form a circle, kneel down and pray. It was a spiritual moment for me and I am glad I was insistent on going. Afterwards, the torch was lit and passed around the circle. We then headed home to pick up my mother and brother with the food. While coming down the hill, I slipped but I didn't get hurt. jajaja.... I wish I could have seen myself falling. I just sat there and laughed. . . and by the time my sister was taking a few steps toward me to help me up, I was already on my feet.

Once we got the food and a bathroom break, we headed out again. This time we were going to wait at the Columbia junction for the runners to appear, whom we planned on following to Blue Creek. We had a lot of time to wait so we had supper under a starlit sky. As always, there was a lot of talking and laughing. That is never absent!!! We got to Blue Creek around 10 or minutes after. Mrs. Esther Sho gave a short welcome address and they shot fireworks for each corner. They also lighted what looked like 15-20 feet of pop-shots strung in a tree. Afterwards, there was more firework display and that was when the camera's battery went dead. Because of that, I was unable to get pictures and a video of the the Fire Ball game. They actually played with a ball of fire!

Oh, and let me not forget the tamales and cacao drink that was shared with everyone. Overall, I loved yesterday just as I love today and tomorrow, but what makes it more special is the fact that it is the time when I start hearing from everyone I haven't heard from in a while.

The Harvest

Dad finally got to take us to the farm today. I was very excited about going in the morning but by the end of the day I was almost wishing I didn't have to be there. I was beginning to feel the heat of the blazing sun and we didn't take along enough water. There were a few flies that were buzzing around close to my ears, and when I took a rest during lunch the ants and ticks were crawling all over my arms. I haven't noticed yet if any ticks found a sucking spot.

Overall, I would do it again but. . .

I can be asked to plant the seeds and I would gladly do it. Ask me to clean out the weeds and I would do that too. However, when it's time to harvest and the weeds have formed a sort of carpet over the plants, don't really expect me to hunt for the beans.

What makes me so glad today is that I didn't come in close contact with any scorpions. I only had a spider crawl up my leg but I noticed it just in time and I was quick to shake it off.

Also, while hunting for bean stalks through the vines, I noticed a bird's nest. I took a peep inside and saw the tiniest winged creature! I thought it was hungry since it kept opening it's beak. I hope Mother Bird got some food for it. Instinct was telling me to take the camera today but I ignored it. If the birdie is still there when I go back on Monday to finish harvesting, I will make sure I get a picture.

Heaven: Horses?

Three weeks ago I asked the kids in Sunday class if a statement was true or false. The statement is as follows: 'There is a book in the Bible which says that there will be no other horses in heaven except horses'.

Super Early Morning Thoughts

Well, thoughts and memories keep coming back and again, as it usually is, I am going through a mini insomnia phase again. My sisters are out helping out an old friend with her wedding deco, nails and what not's. They were expecting me to go but at the last minute I started having pain in tummy area. Seems like it's gone now. So now I am up waiting for them to get back home while listening to my own thoughts and also to the occasional annoying snore of Mom and Dad. Also, somebody woke up early somewhere in the village booming out some P.U.P tracks. Before I got back here, my sister told me the U.D.P had their rally at the football field [not far from where we live, actually, sort of right across]. Later on in the day it will be P.U.P's turn but rumor is that the other party wants to stop it by hosting a football marathon. Whatever happens, politics will be what it is.

Speaking of which, as I stepped off the bus at dump this evening, Beka pointed out a political sign to me. It made me want to change by blogs' title or page title [whatever it's called]. As I have always said, I write down things and go back to analyze them later, after a few years, months, or minutes, it just doesn't matter. The point is that I do look at them again. So, I started thinking about this 'Enough is Enough' thing. Now I have come to the thought, not a conclusion, that there can never be E-N-O-U-G-H. They just keep coming, whether you are ready or not. Maybe enough for now is more like it. I'll keep thinking about what would look best at the top of the page. Something that says a little but a lot at the same time. I'm not sure I can come up with something like that but I'll see.

Back to the wedding, I don't know why people choose to marry too early. The bride doesn't get her 'beauty sleep', if there is such a thing. The family is up for most of the night running around with flashlights in their hands to light the way. It is safe to say that that is mostly the job of the women since the men all gather to share a few quarts and elephant foot. By the time it is time [8 a.m], people are tired, men are drunk or with goma and some family members end up missing the ceremony. One fact about weddings though, [i don't know yet if all families do it, but here goes] everybody pitches in by donating rice, beans, meat, or whatever they can give. That didn't come out the right way so here is an example. Say there is a family of maybe 5. The first son wants to get married so it is his parent's obligation/responsibility to help out with the expenses. The married son then has to help his younger siblings with their wedding expenses as a form of repayment to his parents. Maybe that example is clear enough.

Moving on, day before yesterday, I received a text message from Anna telling me that a Visiting Man and his Single Son will be here soon. She says mom stressed on the 'SINGLE SON'.
My reply: "I knw mom probably worries dat she won't get 2 c any grandkids, bt he isn't d solution". She says: "LMAO. . ." I say: "dey finish wit Beka, now dey strt wit me". Her reply: "U hav us laughin". If Grandma was still around, she would probably say the same thing. She knew relationship updates in my sisters and cousin's life but never mine. However, she was convinced I was hiding someone.

Anyway, more of Gran next time. I was walking in Cayo day before and there was a man coming behind me with a horse. The dogs were barking and I heard him talking. I didn't pay mind as I thought he was speaking to himself or on the phone. Moments after, I realized he was telling me something. In Spanish, he asks me if I would like a ride. I just smiled and said no. He then asks if I would like to hold the reins. Again I smiled and said no. He also asked if I had ever rode on a horse. When I answered no again, he said it was easy. Thinking back, if it was in another place with green hills and small streams, I would have accepted. That along with the offer being made by a younger man. My fear of horses wouldn't have bothered me then. For now, I will just admire their beauty from far.

Well, I guess I'd better get at least a half hour rest. It looks like my sisters won't be back soon. That means that if they don't, I have to find something to do with the kids in Sunday Class in 3 hours! Yikes! Maybe I'll just continue with Tic-Tac-Know. They seem to enjoy it and it gives me an insight as to what they have been learning. I suppose I won't get a nap after all, since hunger is setting in as the day breaks. . .

Story Time!!!

Each time I visit my grandparents in Corozal, Grandfather begins his storytelling. He knows how much I love to listen to him talk so as I finish greeting and giving hugs to everyone, we sit down in the kitchen and the story begins!
Here is one as I remember as he told me as he remembers as he was told by his grandfather. . . [a sort of edited version and pardon me if I get scenes mixed up because this is the first time I'm testing out my skills as a storyteller. Maybe I should say a story writer?
In a land [not certain whether it was far or near but let's settle for not very far away], a woman did her best to make ends meet. She raised turkeys and sent her son to sell them throughout the land. He was not to return until he had some money. So off he went with his turkey. Going house to house and street to street, he realized that no one was interested in taking ownership of the turkey. He didn't give up though and continued walking until he came near the castle.
Being tired of walking around with a turkey, he decided to stop for a rest. While he rested, a young woman approached him and asked what he was doing. He replied by saying that his mother sent him out to sell the turkey but that no one wanted to buy. She became thoughtful and finally told him that she would take the turkey and give him something in exchange. He agreed, not knowing what her bargain was. So, he gave his turkey over to her and waited for her end of the bargain. Slowly, she started lifting the hem of her blouse while he waited in suspense.
He tried to tear his gaze away, but she wouldn't let him. Imagine his surprise when he saw what she was showing him! She then told him that each time he gave her a turkey, she would show him more. What he was looking at was the first color on her navel. By now he realized that he wasn't going to get any money for the turkey so he returned home.
When he got there, his mother began asking him how the sale was and demanded to see the money. He told her that it was stolen from him. Upon hearing that, she began to worry for she didn't know how else to get through. The turkeys were all that she had left to sell. He tried to cheer her up but his conscience kept nagging him.
The following day, he took another turkey and went straight to the place where he met the young woman, as they had planned. There, she showed him the second color. For the five days that followed, he returned home with the same story of someone robbing him of the turkey. On the seventh day, she told him not to return because she didn't have anything else to offer him. Not knowing why she showed him the colors of her navel, he returned home, puzzled about the last seven days.
Soon after, word spread that the ruler of the land was in need of entertainment and seeking young men who could guess the seven colors on his daughter's navel. The people at the castle prepared for the festivities and the young men came from all over. For days, one by one each young man started choosing which seven colors he thoughts of and presented them to the ruler but none came close. Finally, the ruler got bored.
Meanwhile, the turkey guy saw that there was a lot of excitement in the land. He set out to find out what it was all about. When he heard, it dawned on him that the young woman he met was none other than the ruler's daughter. He smiled for he knew exactly what the seven colors were. So, what else was he to do? He made his way into the castle and faced the ruler. One by one, he began telling which were the seven colors. So surprised was the ruler when he heard the colors being named. In the end, he couldn't believe so he asked the servants if they had seen him near his daughter at anytime and they said no.
Since no one could prove that they knew each other, the ruler had no other option but to give his daughter as wife to the turkey guy. The wedding was celebrated and the mother was finally happy that she could now forget about her worries of making ends meet.

To What Purpose?

Sometimes I think that it would be better to trust a stranger than the ones who are as close as our family members. Yet that doesn't really make sense because those who get close to us were once strangers. While I was away, something happened that has me wondering. I knew there was a reason unknown to me for not tolerating him but there was nothing I could do about it. Even if I tried to make Sister see, the decisions are hers only. In time, the truth is no longer buried beneath layers of lies and deception. I know I was waiting hopelessly for the news she finally told me during the week, and all I can say is that I am sorry it had to be that way. What was he thinking? I cannot even begin to imagine! He considered himself part of my family so why would he do what he did? Really, what would spying on us gain him?

A week ago, probably around this same time, Dad went behind the house to lock up the storage room. I suppose he wasn't even there yet when he heard footsteps in the dark. Someone was running away! The person ran into the neighbors' yard but not before crashing into a pole my dad placed behind the matchbox of a house for my cat to climb in the ceiling. The neighbor heard his dogs barking and came out to see what the hassle was about. It was he who recognized the person fleeing. He said the person also crashed into something in their yard.

The runner knew that if he went en route to his home, the school, or in the center of the village he would be recognized from far so he opted to go up the hill, away from the light, into the hibiscus bushes planted by the uphill neighbors. It was a good choice but in his haste to get away, and also because of being unfamiliar with the state of the neighbors yard, he ran into squishy mud and BINGO! His tennis got stuck and he didn't have the time or the chance to try to get it out. The neighbor got it out and recognized who's it was but Dad didn't. I wasn't surprised at that part since he never really notices what a person wears. [There was a time when he didn't even recognize his own daughter! How bad can it get? Oh, and birth dates and ages.]

The following morning, Dad walked around the yard and he saw where Sister's X walked. Mom says she saw a light by the 'sambo' trees, probably from his phone, and I am guessing that was at the same time he sent my other Sister weird text messages. We still don't understand what he meant. Anyway, from there he must have used the pigpen as cover and made his way through the front yard no one really walks through. The footprints led to the corner of the kitchen, where he could peep through the cracks for as long as he wanted, unnoticed.

What all that was about? Who am I to say? All I know for sure is that it bothers me and I keep thinking that that wasn't the first time he was spying on my family. He tries anything else, I'll be right here waiting. Sister says he knows I don't like him and I always catch him looking [sort of starting] at me. He probably tries to figure out what lies beneath a cool, uninterested surface.

Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow

I finally got through the task I had been putting off for maybe two weeks. It feels so good to have done it!!! Yesterday, as always, my day began by waking up at 9 a.m to watch my favorite telenovela. When that was over, I went into the kitchen to have breakfast. Afterwards, it was laundry time. Our washing machine spoiled sometime last week so I had no other option but to do it by hand. I'm just glad the sun was not as hot as the day when my sister was washing. I hadn't washed that way for so long so by the time I was done, my back was killing me!!! Anyway, after that, I started to figure out how to do the cultural Maya blouse or 'camisa'. I got through the cutting and after so many measurements I got the size of the sleeve, which still turned out to be too long. Last night I was working on the tiny pleats of each sleeve and it got frustrating after a while because it didn't stay straight after I ironed it. So, I decided to press each pleat as I did them. It turned out to be much neater than the first sleeve I did so I had to redo the first. I got tired of sitting so I left everything as it was and I can't remember what I did afterwards.
Whatever, what I did wasn't important I guess since it has been erased from my memory. I woke up early this morning to my sister's annoying alarm. I was hoping to get back to sleep after they left home to go to the cacao farm, but I never did. It's hard to fall asleep again once I hear them laughing and talking. I didn't join them this time, since I wanted them to think that I was still sleeping. I only heard my sister complaining about me still being asleep, that was around 6 a.m. Who ever wakes up that early when they have nothing extremely important to do? There are 24 hours in a full day and I can always borrow some hours from another day, can't I? Anyway, right before they left, I got up and started another tiring day.
I started working on the sleeve again and at the end, I was satisfied with the outcome. I took some small breaks between 9 and 10 a.m to watch t.v. since I wasn't getting any progress with the rest of the blouse. It's a really simple style but a few of the steps are complicated, especially since the mother of the child didn't bring a blouse I could copy from. I had to work with one that belongs to Beka, and I am still not sure if the teenie-weenie blouse I did will fit her or not. I didn't even see how big she is when she came a few weeks ago. So much for my sewing passion!! I didn't even bother to take measurements. Ha! It was till afterwards that I realized I didn't do what had to be done, but I made it. Such a tiny thing but it took me my whole day. My butt felt numb after sitting for so long and here I am sitting down again. Never seem to care about my butt. . . Ha! Back to my boring ramblings about the blouse, I got tired of doing tiny pleats and stitching, unstitching [is that a word?], and re-stitching more than 3 times. I would have it no other way though. I pride myself in doing the best I can and retrying everything even at times it seems hopeless to do so. It always pays off!!!
I didn't intend to stitch by hand today but I wasn't satisfied with what the machine was doing so I threaded my needle and voilà, I was finally satisfied with the whole blouse. I got done around 5 this evening, but I still had a few touches to add. I threaded my needle again, this time with black embroidery thread, and began to do a zig-zag stitch on the sleeve. My first attempt wasn't satisfactory so I undid it and went to have lunch/supper. I didn't realize how hungry I was until I put down my needle and thread. When I was done eating, I picked it up again and I finally got the stitch right. I finished one side before I decided to leave it for the day. Tomorrow morning I will work on the other side and then get ready for my trip to Cayo!!! Gosh, I miss being there so tomorrow night I'll be there!!! I'll get back home in just a week before my b-day!!! I just realized that I haven't spent a birthday here ever since I turned 16!!!!

Post-summer to the Present

There are times when I think about what matters. What makes life worthwhile? I have been away from the classroom since July and although I miss that part of my life, I still love where I am at now. The first month and a half I spent in Columbia with my family, then I decided to head to Corozal to meet my aunt who needed help with her baby. I got to my grandparent's house in the night and since the town people were having activities to celebrate Independence Day, my uncle decided to carry us out. I enjoyed watching and listening, especially the fireworks. I also went to the parade the day after, then later on in the day my aunt and I flew over to San Pedro. It had been a few years since I was there last, so I was glad to be there again. The only thing I didn't like about it were the mosquitoes, those little suckers are no good. Anyway, time went by and I got used to my new routine; which was sweep, do the dishes, give Amber her bath, put her to sleep, read a book, and knead flour few times during the week. Mid-October was graduation time and I got to go to Cayo again but only for a few days. I was glad to see my family again. After grad., I went back to my aunt's, still enjoying the time I had to do something to help her family. When the time came for me to leave in early December, I found it hard to do because I had already formed a bond with Amber. She is such a sweet child. It broke my heart to hear her crying for me as I was leaving. I wish I could have brought her with me, but that wasn't possible. I made my way over again to San Ignacio and stayed a few days. I don't know why I just can't seem to leave that town!!! Anyway, I have been in Columbia since early December and it has been great. I have helped my mom in the house, done a lot of cleaning, and also farming along with my dad. I have never really liked the feeling of being surrounded by walls with a few windows so I am glad to spend time outdoors. When my dad said he needed help planting beans, I was very happy to go along. If my grandmom was still here to see me going to the farm, she would be just as happy as I am for she was a hard-working woman!!!! Dad taught me how to measure the distance each hole should be made and how many seeds to drop in the hole. I enjoyed doing it even though it doesn't seem like fun to poke a stick in the ground and bend over to drop some seeds. Other than the that, the weeks and days go by with almost nothing interesting to do. X-mas came and gone and there was almost no festive spirit in me. Then for New Year's, my parents decided to renew their wedding vows, since it was their 25th anniversary. We killed a pig and there was a lot of good food. I forgot that the week before, my aunt from Corozal made what we call 'choch' or 'blood pudding'. There was something about it that made me want more and more [i didn't use to eat it when my grandmother gave us]. It was until later that I learned that it wasn't done the right way. It doesn't matter to me, I liked the new way and I will eat it no other way. So, ever since the year started, the family has been going to the Cacao farm in San Antonio at least once a week. My dad finally realized that he has been making the pods go to waste. I love going there because it is shady and cool under the trees and we spend our time laughing and talking, something that never lacks in my family. There is always a lot to be happy about. During the time that I am not at the farm, I do my chores in the house or the laundry sometime during the week. Other than that, I sometimes tend to my flowers and some of the herbs/spices that I've planted. There are a few days when I tell mom to let me takeover in the kitchen. I'm glad I haven't heard any criticisms!!! That's something good because my mom and dad's taste buds are usually hard to please. Moving on, I have also been doing some other small stuff to occupy my time. I have picked up my embroidery threads, cloth and hoop again. The last time I did one was in high school. It all comes back and i keep adding on so I don't keep doing the same thing for too long. Besides that, I also work with a sewing machine. My dad said he would get an electric one, but I told him that could wait since I don't use it much. Speaking of which, I have to do a 'camisa'[cultural wear] for a little girl soon. I don't know where to start but I will get it done. Other than that, I have also started working with wire. I don't have the right type of wire but I wanted to use up more of my time so I grabbed dad's tools and his tying wire. They still look pretty and I hope to continue with it. I'm just glad I haven't developed any blisters. Back to where I started, I am just happy with what I have for now - a worry-free life. Although I know I will have to end it soon.